I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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