You were right. It hurts to walk today.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
