we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
