if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
You may now shotgun with the bride
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
