quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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