We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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