please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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