what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize