Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize