and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
