so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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