dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
