yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Apparently you make a good broom.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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