the new term for farting is butt boxing.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
