Farmville is her only friend.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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