Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
