If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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