party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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