White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
