so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
