I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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