May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I could fuck to npr.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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