I have demons in me.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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