if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Randomize
