I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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