Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
