He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
