I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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