i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
