"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
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