We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
