these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize