I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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