let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
