Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
