I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
