I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Sober January is a disaster.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
