it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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