I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
God I need to hump something, right now.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize