sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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