i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
