More tranny stories later!
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
