he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
