brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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