I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Randomize
