i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
