i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
