I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize