He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
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