There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize