I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
