Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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