no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize